Wednesday, July 6, 2011
It is What it is...
Nevertheless, my tickets are purchased and arrangements have been made to make the 24-hour trek from my meeting in Las Vegas, Nevada to Boise, Idaho next Friday afternoon. All in time for my brother's (the only one I have known my entire life) wedding on Saturday and to experience reuniting together with our dad.
You can only begin to imagine the emotions I have experienced over the past few weeks since my discovery. There have been times that they have been so strong that they have kept me preoccupied wondering what to do next, or where do I go from here. Something I really cannot afford with the current crazy busyness of my life. Nevertheless, I have welcomed the emotions, embraced this experience and have done my best to express them to my family and friends.
However and oddly enough, sometimes I found myself not really able or in a position to share the full extent of these emotions. While distance has kept me sharing the completeness with some, there have been other factors too that I have not really been able to put my finger on. Perhaps it is because there has not been a willing audience, who was really willing to be open to these sharing the emotions or my experience with me, or perhaps it is my fear of really letting those emotions out for fear that disappointment could win out. Whatever those reason(s), I have decided not to focus on what didn't happen or what I would have liked to have happened. I decided to take hold and go for it. While I envisioned the experience of being reunited with my dad a little differently in my original plan, "it is what is" now.
As I listed in my "wake-up call" today, I am not waiting. I have taken charge and I am doing something about it in order to continue with this beauty I am experiencing in my life and to welcome the dream I am about to experience.